"Returning to Lhasa to Witness the Current Situation" By Woeser

High Peaks Pure Earth has translated a blogpost by Woeser that was originally written for broadcast on Radio Free Asia on November 17, 2010 and posted on her blog on November 25, 2010.

In this blogpost, Woeser reflects on her stay in Lhasa and paints a vivid picture of the military presence and the changes to the face of the city.

This blogpost was the first to be uploaded onto Woeser's blog following a coordinated cyber attack on her blog, Twitter, Facebook and GMail on November 23, 2010. At the time of writing, all accounts, except the GMail account, have been restored.

Lama Jigme Has Returned Home!!! by Woeser

High Peaks Pure Earth has translated a blogpost by Woeser that was posted on her blog a little earlier today, readers are encouraged to follow that link to see many photos of Lama Jigme that Woeser has posted.

High Peaks Pure Earth previously reported Lama Jigme's detention and is happy to learn of his release.


Lama Jigme Has Returned Home!!! by Woeser

Extremely unexpectedly, fortunately, joyfully, I have learned --

Labrang Monastery's Lama Jigme, having spent an entire half year in detention, was released on May 3rd and has returned home!!!

Last year on September 3rd, Lama Jigme was featured on a video that was made public. Alone and facing the camera he spoke for approximately twenty minutes showing his face, using his real voice and his real name, on events that had occurred in Tibet since March 2008 and gave a full testimony, expressing his hopes as an ordinary Tibetan monk. (see http://www.highpeakspureearth.com/2008/09/voa-video-testimony-of-labrang-monk.html )

Following Voice of America Tibetan Service's broadcast of this video testimony, Lama Jigme went into hiding for almost two whole months. Finally, not long after returning to his monastery, on November 4th, over 70 police suddenly surrounded his living quarters, took him from his quarters and detained him until May 3rd without any explanation and his whereabouts were unknown.

At present, more details are not known.

In short, offer prayers for Lama Jigme, he has finally returned home and is near his close relatives, back to his monastery days, wish him a good rest and a speedy return to health!

Offer prayers to all Tibetans who are enduring suffering!

Labrang Monk, Jigme, Arrested

A few weeks ago, we posted the video testimony of a monk from Labrang, Jigme. We have just learned that he has been arrested. At around 1pm on November 4th, Jigme was arrested from his quarters in Labrang Monastery. Approximately 70 armed police came to arrest him and there were also army trucks and police cars that removed him from his quarters with their sirens blaring.


Jigme's video testimonies were broadcast by Voice of America on 3rd September 2008 and he had been in hiding since then before recently returning to his quarters in his monastery. View his video testimonies here. At present nobody knows his whereabouts or what will happen to him in the future. Read articles about Jigme's arrest from The Times and The National.

A Sera Monk's Petition to Hu Jintao

In the mid-1980s, unsuspecting tourists to Lhasa suddenly found Tibetans thrusting crumpled pieces of paper into their hands requesting them to pass them onto the United Nations. Sometimes these documents contained names of prisoners and others, written in florid style, detailed human rights abuses and appealed for the UN’s intervention. Such appeals barely made the news and were often seen as no more than naive and misplaced hope on the UN.

High Peaks Pure Earth received a copy of a petition submitted to President Hu Jintao by a monk from Sera Monastery in Lhasa. The petition is the first detailed account of the incident of 10th March at Sera Monastery and refutes Chinese media coverage of the protest. The Tibetan version of the petition can be found on the Tibetan language website Khabdha. More information on Sera Monastery can be found here: http://www.thlib.org/places/monasteries/sera/

An Appeal Made to President Hu Jintao and Concerned Leaders Based on my Personal Experience of Suffering

I am a very ordinary student of the central seats of Sera and Drepung [monasteries], a centre for traditional Tibetan education that has become a blissful realm for the core psyche of all Tibetans. I have the desire to honestly express some of the present problems faced by the Tibetan monasteries that I have seen, heard and experienced. That is because I am a citizen of the nation and you people are the leaders who work for the welfare of the citizens.

Are we entirely responsible for the events of March 14th?

This year in March, trouble arose everywhere in Tibetan areas, principally starting in Lhasa and, through a series of tragic events, caused great loss of life as well as property for both the protestors and those protested against. I believe that the statement by the authorities that the cause of the incident is solely due to the instigations of the ‘separatists’ is an incomplete one. That is because such an approach of stubbornly laying all blame upon the Tibetan people is widely seen as being irresponsible among the intellectuals within the country as well as among the international community.

Otherwise, it may be asked why is it that the so-called ‘Splittists’, for their own selfish ends, disregarding the actual fate of the Tibetan people, were able to orchestrate the Tibetans both in and outside Tibet with such ease; and why were the Tibetan people who, according to the central government, are supposed to be enjoying a happy and enriched life that is akin to a change of heaven and earth, thought nothing of risking their very lives to be so ready and receptive to such separatist activities being promoted. Moreover, even though the government claims that under the instigation of the Dalai Lama, the leaders of the present protests were the monks of Tibetan monasteries led by Sera, Drepung and Ganden, yet in reality the real cause is the desperation we experience in our daily life, on account of oppression, fear and restrictions. It is a cry for freedom.

In the minds of senior monks who have been long term residents of monasteries studying the scriptures, and particularly the bulk of monk students, the causes and conditions of the current or the past and presently unfolding events need to be looked at from two perspectives.

The bullying and forcible expulsion of students:

For a monk to study Buddhism is the only way to seek one's ultimate goal. As it is clear from many hundred years of history, for us the large monasteries, with deep foundations in traditional education, like Sera, Drepung and Ganden, are the best educational institutions even in the present time. But for any monk, whether coming from far away or living nearby, the opportunity to study in these large monasteries is very rare because of governmental restrictions. Even for the small number of monk students in these monasteries they have been facing restrictions on their stay and experiencing expulsion campaigns even to the extent of their beddings being thrown out of their quarters by the officials. Such incidents are not a one-time matter. For example there have been many such incidents in the central seats of Sera, Drepung and Ganden monasteries, Serta Larung monastery in Kham (Sichuan), and Ngaba Kirti monastery in Amdo (Qinghai). Likewise the monastery management officials, assigned specifically by the government, randomly enter the monks' quarters for inspection. They not only whimsically search the quarters, but also indulge in countless acts that are irritating and insulting to us, such as stepping on beds and even beddings with their shoes on.

The spiritual relationship between a teacher and his disciples and forcing one to protest against one's teacher:

One of the many campaigns like this is the so-called "patriotic re-education campaign". In general, even though it is a very common phenomenon of life for a country’s citizen and a religious practitioner to cherish one's nation and love one's religion, the government, rather than protecting our faith, do not even have respect and forcefully order us to attack His Holiness the Dalai Lama, thus creating disturbances in the minds of the monk community. Consequently there have been many cases of quite a few monks being expelled from monasteries when they refused to write denunciations [against His Holiness]. For a religious community, such pressure is seen as the deliberate destruction of our educational opportunity and faith by the concerned authorities of our nation. What is His Holiness the Dalai Lama or what is our relationship with him? He is the human manifestation of Arya Avalokiteshvara in the form of a monk. He is the wish fulfilling jewel who in every life comes in the form of a human that bestows the elixir of compassion and wisdom in the clean clear hearts of all sentient beings in general, and feeble Tibetans in particular. The Tibetan saying, "If one possesses a wish fulfilling jewel then depending on it all of ones wishes will be fulfilled spontaneously" is quite true. He is truly the victorious wish fulfilling jewel or the Dalai Lama. Why does the government persist in forcefully making us attack His Holiness the Dalai Lama? For what reason is our faith and devotion being trampled like this? Why are obstacles being placed directly or indirectly to our educational facilities?

The Condition of Sera, Drepung and Ganden monasteries before the Cultural Revolution:

The education system of Tibetan monasteries that has at least more than one thousand four hundred years of history is the heart of Tibetan religion and literature (culture). Through a long history of ups and downs it has continued to the present. It has become like a heart jewel of this nationality which is quite backward in terms of material civilization. Moreover, due to the influence of Je Tsongkhapa, who was born in Amdo and studied in central Tibet, the development of Tibetan religion and literature received unprecedented encouragement and inspiration. This doctrine of Lobsang Dakpa or Gelugpa tradition refers to the attainment of extraordinary experience by him who, devoted to his teacher and much more devoted to the meaning of reality than to his teacher, through his profound analytical investigation and in-depth evaluation of this more than seven hundred year old Tibetan Buddhist culture by keeping the profound teachings of the Buddha and the Indian scholars as the base or reference point. He who had accomplished the path of scholars and siddhas, along with his immediate disciples, had newly established the monasteries of Sera, Drepung, Ganden, Tashi Lhunpo etc., which had a huge impact on Tibetan culture. Even at present the popularity of Sera, Drepung and Ganden monasteries is well known not only in Tibet but also nationally and internationally.

The Tibetan monastic educational impact from these three monasteries is not only great in the central U-Tsang area of Tibet. For instance, the all-knowing Ven. Jamyang Shepa Ngawang Tsundue, who established Labrang Tashi Kyil monastry which is famous in Amdo area, had studied at Lhasa's Drepung monastery. Similarly Kirti Khabgon, who established Ngaba Kirti monastry which now stands in Amdo Ngaba in Sichuan province, had also studied at Drepung monastry. Likewise Shar Kalden Gyatso, who established Rebgong Rongpo monastery in Qinghai province, had studied at Ganden monastery in central Tibet. In brief, for almost all of the famous Lamas and intellectuals of the Gelug sect in all three provinces of Tibet, namely Kham, Amdo and U-Tsang, their main alma maters have been Sera, Ganden and Drepung. Furthermore, even speaking in terms of schools of thought, those who have enrolled in these monasteries for study were not only Gelug tradition holders but also reincarnate lamas and monks from all other traditions such as Sakya, Kagyud, Nyingma, Jonang and Bon. (As I have lived and studied for many years in these monasteries, I am only mentioning Sera, Drepung and Ganden as examples here. Otherwise almost all other monasteries in all three provinces of Tibet, irrespective of their traditions, face similar problems).

The need to implement the policy of real freedom of religion:

To ignore a cultural tradition that accords with the actual interests of Tibetan people, who are spiritually devoted and culturally rich, while limiting the number and expelling the monks and nuns in general, and monk and nun students in particular, are practical evidence that the policy of religious freedom remains just rhetoric and not being put into actual practice.

Following the March 14th incident more than a thousand monks from Sera, Drepung and Ganden monasteries - centres of Tibetan Buddhist learning - were forcibly evicted and individual quarters ransacked at night by the hundreds of thousands of military men who forcibly entered into the monasteries by breaking all the doors of colleges and monks' quarters with weapons such as guns etc. in their hands. There were apparently many instances where pictures of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, cell phones, electronic calculators and money were lost or stolen. I was told that in some other areas of Tibet the military confiscated all the pictures of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, spread them out on a ground near the monastery, trampled them with their feet and then went away. Another surprising thing I heard was that vegetable-knives in the kitchen of some monks were also taken away. Later on we realized that those were taken as evidence to prove us as violent. In this way the monks were beaten, arrested and detained for more than six months. Even after their release they were not allowed to return back to their monasteries. While in the prison the monks made several verbal and written requests stating that they don't mind staying there as long as needed, but later send them back to their monastery where they study. But all their requests fell on deaf ears like stones thrown in the water. How true is the Tibetan proverb that says, "Tibetans are betrayed by hope and Chinese are betrayed by suspicion." In this manner more than thousands of ordinary monks, without protection and livelihood, suddenly had to stop treading on their chosen-path of life in, on account of fear, hardship and sorrow. Now, where will these monks, who, leave aside other things, were not even able to put their shoes on and just went out with their slippers during the time of their arrest by the military policemen from Sera, Drepung and Ganden, go? There is no monastery in one's native locality. Even if there is one, there is no facility to study. Where does such an ordinary monk – who has no monastery or individuals to depend on as his family members and relatives have died - go?

The law must not create obstacles but should instead suppport the survival and development of this Tibetan Buddhist tradition:

In this age of information, Tibetan monks also should be provided by our country a universal educational facility (opportunity), according to their choice, and not create obstacles to receive an education. Largely some of these depend very much on the services and opportunities provided and created by the government.

Firstly, the one child family planning policy has not only put the Tibetan nationality, which is small in population and large in area, in danger in terms of numbers, but it has also automatically limited the number of ordained population as well.

Secondly, the law that restricts anyone becoming ordained before eighteen years of age has closed one of the doors for a religious community.

Thirdly, because of the restriction imposed on the number of monks in many of popular monasteries with excellent Buddhist studies environment the opportunity to study has been curtailed for many monks who yearn for learning, just as a thirsty person yearns for water. On the contrary, I believe that counting people permitted to prostrate, to go for circumambulation, and to erect prayer flags as the representation of the enjoyment of freedom of religion (from the disk entitled "Tibet from its Historical Perspective" produced by the government) is a mere external gesture to deceive others but it displays one's real face rather than help benefit the actual work of our country and nationalities. Even while the path of the foundation of religious activities is becoming smaller and smaller every day as the younger Buddhist followers face problems entering the monasteries and face difficulty in getting opportunity to study even after entering the monasteries, reconstructing a few temples and giving Geshe Lharampa degrees etc., including many other activities, conducted by the authorities in the name of restoration of monasteries, are merely external displays. There is absolutely no definitive guarantee that such activities help sustain and develop this rich and profound Tibetan Buddhist cultural heritage. Compared to the period before the Cultural Revolution the Tibetan monastic population has fallen ten times: Sera had 9900 monks before but has merely 850 monks at present, Drepung had more than 10000 monks before but fewer than 1400 monks at present, Ganden had 5400 monks before but has less than 400 at present. According to the government, the present total number of the ordained population is about 74500 and there are more 1700 religious establishments. This is the figure only for the Tibet Autonomous Region. Compared to the monk population of the region, since not more than only ten percent of the monks are able to receive the opportunity to study, how is it possible for the monks who are ignorant about the philosophical tenets of the Dharma be able to preserve and develop this Buddhist tradition? How can we make this religious tradition in accordance with socialist society?

The Tibetan monasteries are the centres for the practice of Buddha Dharma:

It is a matter of great joy that the government has spent and is still spending a huge amount of money to restore the monasteries. Far more important than that is to help create an effective education facility in the monasteries and not create obstacles, and I will keep waiting with much hope and evidence that the bright rays of the Party’s policy of freedom of religion will shine on the actual life of the common people.

To look at Tibetan monasteries as mere museums is to set the standard too low. If that remains the case, then not only does it betray the conditions for the survival of the monasteries but it also goes against the need of establishing them in the first place. Why is there a need to establish a monastery? Because it is a traditional school or a spiritual practice centre where Lord Buddha's profound and sublime teachings - brightened by the works of many standard Indian Buddhist scholars and adepts led by the Six Ornaments and Two Supremes and further enriched by a unique Tibetan way of life known as Tibetan Buddhism whose fundamental essence is based on the view of interdependent origination and the conduct of non-violence - are studied. It is also a place where the genuine practitioners of this profound doctrine are nurtured. The external cosmetic displays, such as flying prayer flags, doing prostrations, circumambulating a temple, painting deities and constructing temples that are the outer expressions of some parts of the culture, cannot represent the survival and development of Tibetan Buddhism. Hence if the monasteries remain merely as tourist spots and museums, then there is no need for monasteries as there is no reason why the museums run by the government cannot serve the same purpose?

Distortion and the accusations of splitting nationalities:

We were really greatly hurt and disappointed by the fact that during the March 14th incident the official news media, based on a few people who appeared in the scene wearing monk-robes, propagated, not only nationally but internationally as well, by stating that Tibetan monks had beaten, broken into places, robbed and burned. For example, during the peaceful demonstrations by the monks from Sera, Drepung and Ganden on March 10th, 11th, and 12th,etc. thousands of military men, with lethal weapons, surrounded the monks who were tear-gassed and beaten. Such photos were nowhere to be seen. On the contrary, when the police sprayed tear-gas on the assembly of monks the monks tried to throw water on themselves to wash away the effects of tear-gas, but a distorted photo was shown saying that the monks threw water on the policemen. Similarly a couple of people, getting desperate and threatened by the overwhelming power of weapons, with rocks in their hands, were described as violent and aggressive. Likewise many incidents of March 14th have been distorted and propagated nationally and internationally. Even though such deceptive and short-sighted actions are a matter of real surprise and disappointment, this will be a temporary phenomenon as history will definitely clear everything. What I have heard is that presently whenever Han travelers see monks or even Tibetans traveling in buses in the cities around the country, the Han Chinese get off the buses. Alas, what strong distortion is being created by the government or its propaganda agents whose eyes of wisdom to see the effects of causality are blinded! More than a billion honest and diligent people of China have been deceived in such a way at once! As this ever present talk of national harmony and protection of the motherland continues what purpose is there, while talking of national unity, to spread such rumours and create dissension between the nationalities? Isn't this the real separatism?

The government must support in practice to fulfill the expectations of the people rather than merely talk about people's expectations:

In recent times what the government repeatedly expects from religious institutions is that this religion should be in accordance with socialist society. I believe that this is a really good idea. Any culture that remains separate from the service of society becomes devoid of essence. Likewise, religion also survives and develops for the benefit of society, and to adapt to the changing time and society not only has a strong connection with the prospects of religious activities themselves but also relates to the benefit of the general devotees. But it is not enough merely to say that religion needs to be in accordance with socialism. Rather, providing the devotees a meaningful freedom of religion or opportunity to study remains the crucial question of whether the above rhetoric will materialize into concrete action. Therefore, we hopefully await the time when through the farsighted wisdom and pragmatism of the concerned leaders, in the twenty first century bright rays of the central government’s policy of openness and liberalization will immediately fall on our actual cold life.

Finally, I pray that the stability of the Peoples Republic of China and the unity of the different nationalities may sustain without degeneration and the warm sunlight of freedom shines on all of China.

I have honestly and openly submitted the above mentioned problems, practically being faced by thousands and thousands of people like myself, to the higher authorities, working for the benefit of the people, for your reference and consideration. I hope this appeal will enable [the authorities] to see some of our fundamental problems in our actual day to day life. Nevertheless, since I was unable to receive an opportunity to study until I was seventeen years of age and on top of that due to my little knowledge and lack of inherent wisdom I might have been unable to express myself or I might have been unable to put into writing what I intended to write. In brief since this is merely an opinion of an ordinary citizen, please feel free to advise me if the higher authorities deem this an overstatement or if there are any conflicts with the views of the authorities.

Submitted by Ven. Gedun on October 7, 2008. Tashi Delek

Rendered into English by Pema Tsewang Shastri from the Tibetan original.

One Year On... A Letter from Lhasa

It's hard to believe that a year has gone by since the Dalai Lama received the Congressional Gold Medal on 17th October 2007. I remember very clearly staying up and watching the ceremony online at a ridiculous hour because of the time difference. It has been a turbulent year for Tibet since then. Last weekend, as I was procrastinating from doing any real work, I stumbled across a letter I had received from Lhasa written around this time last year which I thought I'd share here. The Congressional Gold Medal ceremony is hinted at in the letter. Some of the names and details have been changed but basically this very sweet, personal letter conveys the feelings of many young Tibetans today who have been educated in China and then return home to Tibet.


Lhasa, October 21st , 2007

It has been over three months since I left Beijing. It is good to come back and work in Lhasa after spending eleven years studying in China. During the past three months, I have been experiencing so many things (positive and negative) emotionally.

Up to now my personal life in Lhasa is fantastic. I am living with my relatives and go back to my own home at weekends. My relatives have a huge apartment building and I have a private room for free. My relatives are people who have a lot of things in common with me in terms of many things. They are quite interested in my job and believe that this job perfectly suits my personality. So I share my working experiences with them. They often encourage me to go abroad for further study in the near future.

I am lucky enough to have my best friend TK with me in the same city. We hang out together as we did back in Beijing. We share our happiness and sorrow. Therefore, on the whole we are as happy as we were before. Besides, TK is as “rude” as before. One day, we went to attend the opening ceremony of a new restaurant together. We took a bus to the restaurant. When we sat down and began to talk, we suddenly realized that a lot of fellow passengers were looking at us curiously. We looked around and saw that we were the only Tibetans on that bus. Naturally, I could not helping feeling as if we were on a bus in Beijing where this kind of situation often occurs. Then TK burst out: "What are you looking at?! Why is it so strange that we speak Tibetan?!?!" The Han Chinese seated beside us did not set curious eyes on us any more. Haha….so this is typical TK. I am sure a lot of people never expected such a character as hers from her cute face.

No matter how well my life is going in Lhasa, there is always a dark or painful side deep in my heart. I believe this is a universal case for Tibetans like me. Never in my life did I realize that the political situation is so intense and so serious here in Lhasa. The ongoing 17th National Party Conference is greatly affecting Tibetan people’s routine life. During the conference, police have been scattered everywhere. On my trip to Lhasa, I found that the Qinghai-Tibet railway was safely guarded by police. Rumour is hard to be blocked among the gossip-natured Tibetans.

Although few Tibetans have a clear idea of what is going on on the international stage, most Tibetans know that something good and exciting is happening. I heard that a good many Tibetans dressed up on special days and went to burn incense as usual in spite of the hard restrictions. I also heard something that happened on that day. A group of nuns were spotted getting off a bus and disappeared around Karma Kunsang (a Tibetan residential area). Immediately, police made raids on every Tibetan household in that area in order to find the nuns. Finally, the nuns were found in a Tibetan house. It turned out that the family had invited the nuns to hold religious activity. Unfortunately in another Tibetan house, police caught twenty monks who were also invited to read Tibetan scripture. So we can imagine what kind of great changes will take place in these two families.

Such kinds of things are happening as life seems to go on happily here. Yesterday, one of my friends from Drepung monastery called me. They told me that during this conference the monastery had been guarded by the police. Monks are not allowed to leave the monastery and enter the city. So this is also what is going on in this seemingly peaceful city. In this city, I guess those who turn a blind eye to what is going on in real life is the happiest person.

There are also a lot of cheerful things occurring here. Nowadays, Tibetan music is becoming more and more popular among Tibetans, especially young Tibetans. Many new-faced Tibetan singers have popped out. I am also enjoying buying any newly published music videos. Apart from music videos, recently a video which advocates vegetarianism is popular among Tibetans. The video shows how the innocent animals are cruelly killed for the sake of human beings’ luxury. I was shocked by the bloody scenes in that video. I felt shameful for human beings’ mercilessness and cruelty. However, it is very difficult for me to be a vegetarian especially when I go for field work.

Just a few days ago, I listened to the Karmarpa’s teaching on vegetarianism. Kamarpa suggested that we can try to eat less meat than before by eating meat in only one meal a day. I realized that his teaching is very reasonable and practical for people like me. So now I do not eat as much meat as before and I found myself rejecting meat from my deeper heart. Whenever I eat meat, I feel guilty. I do intend to become a vegetarian but I try not to eat meat if there is another choice. I observed that nowadays to become a vegetarian is very popular among Tibetans. Luckily, there are two very good vegetarian restaurants in Lhasa now.

"How did my mother participate in the revolution?" by Woeser

This is a translation from Chinese to English by High Peaks Pure Earth. The original article was published on Woeser's blog on 26th January 2007 and can be viewed here. This is the first time that it has been translated into English. In addition to being a fine poet, Woeser writes moving prose and is an accomplished essayist.


Year: 2005

Place: Beijing

People: My mother and I. Below are my mother’s words.

The first time I saw Chinese people was maybe in 1952. They were Chinese people who were preparing to build the roads, carrying banners, whistling and holding various instruments. The adults all called them “Gyami Serbo”, meaning they were yellow Chinese as the clothes they wore were a yellow army uniform. Before that time we had heard about Chinese people, that they ate babies and were devils. So when the Chinese arrived at the village, children in the village were both frightened and excited and went fearfully and secretly to look at them. The interpreter was a Tibetan. He grabbed a young boy and asked him a question, the young boy was frightened and spluttered some nonsense that made all the Chinese laugh. The children were all surprised and whispered in each other’s ears: look, look, the laughter of Chinese people is the same as ours.

Our village is now Wu Yu Township’s Tashi Gang village which at the time belonged to our family Kangga. Kangga is the name of my father’s original family, and after my father lived apart from his family and established a new family, the new one was named Dejang. I was born into Kangga family in Wu Yu Township in 1943. Below Tashi Gang there was some wasteland where barley can not be grown, and it was all rock and sand. Later, during the period “Agriculture learns from Dazhai” a lot of energy would be exerted to reverse it from this state but barley still wasn’t to grow there. At that time, a great many tents of the construction teams were tidily pitched there, which gave us the feeling that they would be there forever.

The arrival of the construction teams was perhaps in 1953. At first they were all Chinese and later they enlisted some local Tibetans. The highway was built from Lhasa to Shigatse, but this is not the same road as the present new highway. The old highway being built at that time is on the whole not used anymore but can be used from time to time. In the past there had been an army depot near the village which was now abandoned.

The Han Chinese road workers wore blue so everyone called then “Gyami Ngonbo” meaning “Blue Chinese”. At that time, our Dejiang family had started to build a new house which later became Wu Yu Township’s village government, now it’s already been torn down. My father was the owner of Numa manor and would often receive dinner invitations from the road teams. Maybe because I had a nice appearance, my parents always took me along to attend these banquets. It was at these occasions that I ate fried peanuts for the first time. They were so fragrant and tasty that I could not help stopping eating. An official of the road team placed a bowl of fried peanuts in front of me, I was very happy and put the fried peanuts into the front pocket of my chuba. As a result, the chest part of my chuba was stained with oil. At that time I had just turned 10 years old.

Han Chinese people from the road teams often came to our home, and their translators were always Tibetans. My older sister fell in love with one of the translators called Gonpo Tseten, an Amdo Tibetan. He was tall and wore a peaked cap and a Mao jacket. The first time he came to our home, my sister fell under his spell. However our parents had already promised her to an ugly, dark skinned, big-nosed man from an aristocratic family in Shigatse. When he and his father visited our home, I had a good look at him whilst pretending to pour tea and then rushed to describe his appearance to my sister, who could not appear before them. My sister absolutely did not want to marry him.

The road team’s cook liked our family’s barley beer, so I would often take a servant and go and deliver barley beer to him. I was just at the age of being very curious and liked to look at strange things. On seeing them eat white rice with black peas it looked far worse than our food at home. The cook often repaid us with a bowl of Sichuan spicy bean sauce which doesn’t taste the same as Indian peppers and tastes very good. The bowl was white with red Chinese characters written on it, later when I fell in love with your father I saw that he also had this kind of bowl.

The road teams stayed at my home village for over a year, they had headquarters and a hospital. They even built a stage and a basketball court. The road teams would sometimes show films. The first time I saw a film my eyes opened very wide in amazement but I have forgotten what film it was that they showed, also I didn’t understand a word of Chinese. Propaganda teams would often come and perform carrying various coloured goose feather fans in their hands during their dances. I cherished these performances and after returning home would make these fans out of wool and learn their dances.

In 1953, my older brother came back from Lhasa. He had been sent to Lhasa very young and went to study in a private school run by Nyarongsha doctor. My brother is 6 years older than me, and at that time he was already very revolutionary in character. At home whilst 20 or 30 servants were eating he sat among them and said that he wanted to divide the land and animals amongst them. The servants all lowered their heads and smiled stealthily and must have all thought that the young Dejiang master was mad. My parents were very angry and later scolded my brother; they told him that if a flood flooded the whole village, it would not leave a dry rock but seeing as that situation had not yet occurred what nonsense had he been spouting?

At that time, my brother had already cut his hair into the revolutionary cropped hairstyle. He took a pair of scissors and to cut everyone’s hair. He cut the maid’s plait and he also cut mine. I didn’t agree to it and as soon as my brother cut my plait off with his scissors I could only cry and accept my fate. I was so shy, my family members called me “Gyami Go” meaning “Chinese head” and from then on I always wrapped my head in a scarf.

On the second day after the haircut, Han Chinese men from the road team came to our home to buy tsampa. The highest ranking official with a camera wanted to take a photo of me as soon as he saw me. So my photo was taken on the roof of the house. I was wearing everyday clothes and was leaning against the ladeng (Shigatse dialect, in Lhasa dialect it is called lazu and it’s a long narrow pole to insert a tree branch with prayer flags on the roof during Tibetan new year). Later, my mother saw the photo and was not happy, she said that I could lean anywhere but not against the ladeng.

The official who took the photo only had one eye. He always wore sunglasses with deep dark lenses so you could not see his eyes. The village children all wanted to see him without his dark glasses, one time they really saw him and in his blind eye’s place was something that looked like a crystal ball which frightened them all. Thinking about it, at that time among the Han Chinese it was he who looked like a devil so when he wanted to photograph me, I didn’t dare to refuse but when he took the photo I wasn’t even smiling a little bit.

At that time, the translator that came with them was not the Amdo one that my sister liked, it was a Dartsedo Tibetan called Palnor who later served as the Director of the district’s traffic department and is now retired. Sometimes we would bump into him on mahjong playing occasions. A few days later, he brought over the developed photo to give to us, he had developed a few copies.

Photo of my mother taken when she was a young girl
(Photographer: My father)

Soon after, I was taken to Lhasa by my brother to go to school. We lived in our Uncle’s home which was around near Meru Temple. My Uncle had been the governor of Pali County. When the PLA advanced into Tibet. he was Chamdo governor Ngapo’s bodyguard. After the Chamdo battle was over, he was also held captive by the PLA. I started to attend the newly established Lhasa Primary School but I missed home very much. When I received my Chinese woollen suit I cried out to go home but my brother did not agree to that and simply forced me to study almost one term. Then it happened that my father came to Lhasa for some work. I went back home with my father and gave the Chinese woollen suit to the servant’s son.

The happy days at home didn’t last long, my brother came back again after which he took me back to Lhasa again to continue studying at Lhasa Primary School. My brother was becoming more and more revolutionary and joined the Lhasa Youth Federation which was a very fashionable group at the time similar to a group of performers. Many young aristocratic boys and girls were part of their activities but I was still young and not interested in those kinds of things. I just wanted to go home. In 1955, my brother went to Beijing to study at the Central Institute for Nationalities. As soon as he left I returned to Wu Yu Township on horseback.

In 1956, my father was poisoned and killed. The next year my sister and I went to Lhasa and it would be many years before returning to Wu Yu. My sister was escaping marriage and I did not like the new stepfather. The two of us started to attend the Tibetan Cadre School which was a school for training Tibetan Cadres. It was at this point that I started to participate in the revolution.

Twittering Tibet

Earthquake in Tibet. An earthquake measuring 6.6 on the Richter scale jolted 'dam gzhung (Ch: Damxung), 82 km from Lhasa, Latitude: 30.274°, Longitude: 90.711°, at 4:30 pm on October 6th. 'Dam gzhung is part of Lhasa Municipality. Read a report about the earthquake from Chinese state media in English here and in Tibetan here.



As misleading reports come through about houses being razed down to the ground in Lhasa, where else to hear the news but from the horse's mouth? Someone in Lhasa has been twittering regularly about daily life in Lhasa and has the following to say about the events of that day:

An earthquake was felt in Lhasa just a minute ago, the quake lasted for only 3 seconds, people were running on the street, dogs barking.
04:33 PM October 06, 2008

And now people were laughing on the street, as if something "exciting" happening.
04:35 PM October 06, 2008

Historically Lhasa wasn't an earthquake zone...", said **** of **** Hotel. It seemed that most people weren't feeling panic.
08:30 PM October 06, 2008

The epicenter of the recent quake was in Damxung County (82km away from Lhasa), the qake measuring 6.6 degress on Richter scale.
09:56 PM October 07, 2008

More than 100 bldgs were destructed in Damxung County, > 30 dead. Nothing much happened in Lhasa, students had a half-day leave.
09:57 PM October 06, 2008

Had hotpot again till 4am, met 2 primary school students on the way back home, they were scared of quake & decided to sleep at Jokhang Sq.
04:47 AM October 07, 2008

And I have to emphasize that the quake only had an extremely minor effect on Lhasa, **** & the buildings around were affected at all.
05:42 AM October 07, 2008

VOA: Video Testimony of Labrang monk Jigme

The video testimonies from Tibet of Jigme, a monk from Labrang Monastery, were first broadcast by Voice of America's Tibetan Service on 3rd September 2008. Following the broadcast, Jigme went into hiding and has not been heard of since. Jigme's story was reported in English media by Associated Press on September 14th 2008. The original broadcast was in Tibetan so for the benefit of those of you who can't understand Amdo dialect, here is an English translation courtesy of Voice of America.

A Voice from Tibet: VOA Tibetan service exclusive video interview (Translation by VOA)

Venerable Jigme, a monk from Labrang Monastery in Amdo (Ch: Gansu Province) speaks about his experience following the widespread protests that erupted throughout the Tibetan areas of China in March/April 2008

This translation of the 20 minute statement is accurate in content but is not a direct translation of every single phrase, word, and figure of speech. References to the identity of Chinese security and detention apparatuses are translated from colloquial Tibetan and may not be technically accurate.

This year, on the 15th day of the second Tibetan month (March 22, 2008), after an assembly was over at the monastery, I went to the market. There I sat at the side of a taxi-stand and got a shoe repaired. As I was returning to the monastery, I received a call on my mobile phone. I looked at the phone, but there was no number visible. Suddenly a white vehicle appeared, and stopped in front of me. Four soldiers arrested me and dragged me into the vehicle. When I looked back, I saw a nun. I shouted "Ani! Ani! [nun, nun!] several times and made sure she saw me getting arrested. Once in the vehicle, they covered my head with a black cloth and handcuffed me. Then with guns pointed at my head, and my body pressed down, they took me to the armed police guest house.

The guest house is at the back of the local police station. There they removed the cloth covering my head but kept the handcuffs on. Afterwards, they searched my body and took my phone, wallet and everything. I was put on a chair with my hands tied at the back. A young soldier pointed an automatic rifle at me and said in Chinese, "This is made to kill you, Ahlos (derogatory term used for Tibetans by some Chinese). You make one move, and I will definitely shoot and kill you with this gun. I will throw your corpse in the trash and nobody will ever know." When I heard this, I was not terrified by the gun pointed at my head but by the thought that this man is not only a soldier or security personnel, but also a law enforcement officer, and here he is pointing a gun at an ordinary citizen and uttering such words…[it made me very sad….] as if my heart was shattered in two.

This is the case of a powerful nationality harassing and oppressing a small nationality, a big nation making weapons to kill a small nationality; if they are doing such things at the lower levels, it goes without saying that they are doing worse things to us at higher levels. The way they oppress and murder Tibetans, and can utter such words while aiming guns [at us], stunned me. By telling us that Tibetans could be killed and our dead bodies dumped in the trash and that nobody would know - we are not even treated like dogs and pigs. If other people's dogs and pigs are killed, there will be somebody to claim them. Then why won't Tibetans be claimed after death? We are ordered not to claim our fellow Tibetans’ bodies even after death. At that time, I realized that there is no racial equality.

During the detention, some of the many questions they asked me were, "Did the Dalai Lama instigate you? Did the Dalai Lama ask you to carry out this looting, burning and destruction?". "How do you view the Dalai Lama? " As for me, I am a follower of Buddhism. The Dalai Lama is like my life, heart and soul. In that I am not alone. For all the six million Tibetans, the Dalai Lama is their spiritual refuge in this life as well as the next. The Dalai Lama is widely respected for his tremendous efforts made towards world peace. He is the champion of world peace. He has established a path of non-violence. I totally reject their accusation that the Dalai Lama has master-minded acts of looting, burning and destruction. The Dalai Lama can never encourage such things. Even an ordinary monk like myself cannot urge anybody to burn, loot and destroy.

His Holiness the Dalai Lama is like the soul of the six million Tibetans. There is no way we can be parted from Him. As a Tibetan monk, historically, we have a teacher-disciple relationship. We must maintain this relationship. We have unwavering faith in the Dalai Lama. This was what I replied to the question of how I view the Dalai Lama.

After keeping us at the detention center for a few days, they took us to the jail. At the prison, the soldiers commanding us in Chinese ‘one, two, three’, as some of us could not understand Chinese, they scolded us - they would call us ‘animals', ‘fools’, and beat us with batons. When we asked why they are beating us, they reply, ‘you people cannot understand Chinese language’ and mock us. My question is: In the Charter and Constitution of the People's Republic of China, it is enshrined that, in the regional areas of different nationalities, the language of that particular nationality is to be used and that the regional nationality must be given the right to govern. Then why is that, in the Tibetan areas, instead of using Tibetan language, Tibetans are not only verbally abused as "animals" and "fools" but are physically beaten just because he does not understand the Chinese language?

There is no differentiation on the basis of one's actions or age. For instance, monks as young as fourteen and fifteen and as old as sixty and seventy year old were arrested. No difference is made whether they are involved in protests or not. We had no clothes on our backs nor shoes on our feet. Two monks would be tied together and put in the vehicle to be driven away. They are thrown in the vehicle like you would throw logs of wood. Even if some of them had their heads injured, and for some, their hands broken, they were all taken to the prison. Relatives or friends were not allowed to bring food, clothing or beddings. We had to huddle together to bear the cold. The reason why we were so severely beaten is solely because we are Tibetans. For that we feel extremely sad.

We were taken to a prison in Kachu [Linxia in Chinese]. All the prisoners there were Chinese and [Hui] Muslim Chinese. We were the only Tibetan prisoners. Everyday, with bare feet, we had to remove urine and excrement, and wash the floors. At the prison, we were forced to take off our monks’ robes and put on a layperson’s clothing. I am a Buddhist monk and it is humiliating to disrobe and put on a layman's clothes, and to be handcuffed and taken away, barefoot, in a vehicle. In the prison, the conditions were very poor - there was not enough to eat or drink and nothing to wear. There wasn't even a towel to clean the face.

I was kept there for one month during which time I was handcuffed in one position for many days and nights. During interrogations, I was accused of having contacts outside: with the Dalai Lama, Samdhong Rinpoche, and Ajia Rinpoche, and that I have to acknowledge that I have these outside contacts. Likewise, I was told that I have contacts inside with scholars and teachers. "You have been involved in activities and have led organizations. You have made calls to many outside provinces. What have you achieved from those? Where did you print the Tibetan flags? How many flags did you print? How many members are there in your group?" and "You have no choice but to accept these crimes". They would hang me up for several hours with my hands tied to a rope….. hanging from the ceiling and my feet above the ground. Then they would beat me on my face, chest, and back, with the full force of their fists. Finally, on one occasion, I had lost consciousness and was taken to a hospital. After I regained consciousness at the hospital, I was once again taken back to prison where they continued the practice of hanging me from the ceiling and beating me. As a result, I again lost conscious and then taken to the hospital a second time. Once I was beaten continuously for two days with nothing to eat nor a drop of water to drink. I suffered from pains on my abdomen and chest. The second time, I was unconscious for six days at the hospital, unable to open my eyes or speak a word.

In the end, when I was on the verge of dying, they handed me over to my family. At my release, my captors lied to the provincial authorities by telling them that that they had not beaten me. Also, they lied to my family members by telling them that they had not beaten me; they also made me put down my thumbprint (as a signature) on a document that said that I was not tortured. I had to stay for about twenty days at a hospital and spent twenty thousand Chinese yuan to get treatment.

On my return to the monastery, friends told me that 180 monks had been arrested. The monks had done nothing wrong. Our senior monk and the official lama (teacher) too were arrested. They were made to stand on the tip of their toes at night, and were beaten with the butts of guns on their back. The Chinese took pictures with their mobile phones as they were beating the monks on their necks.

I also found out that during the police and soldiers raiding the monastery, they stole religious statues, money, personal belongings and even foodstuff from the monastery and monks' private residences. It is apparent that the real looters and murderers are these soldiers of Chinese Communist Party. They engage in illegal acts and we are the ones who are arrested, beaten and tortured and killed.

Also, we are accused of aligning with the Dalai clique and instigating riots among the public. If there is real racial equality, freedom of expression and freedom of religion, then why are we not allowed to respect the figure for whom we have faith in our heart of hearts? Right in front of our eyes, they stamp with their feet on the picture of the Precious One [the Dalai Lama], break the picture frames with butts of guns, shred the pictures into pieces and burn them in the fire. We, being Tibetans and Buddhists, when we see the picture of our object of refuge being trodden under foot, and torn into pieces, we view these as irreparable acts. When Tibetans break a few windowpanes, they say that such acts caused hundreds of millions of Yuan worth of damage. How do you measure the damage caused to our hearts by seeing our most revered One's picture trampled under foot? The Chinese leadership says that the goal is to achieve a harmonious society, but at the same time continue to vilify the Dalai Lama, a figure that all Tibetans respect and honor as their spiritual head…..how can we begin to feel harmony when our values are denigrated and trodden on.

Monks are being beaten off and on all during this period. Not only that, monks who spoke to some reporters were beaten with batons and had their legs broken; on some, they used electric batons on their heads and in their mouths - the electric baton affected their brains and some have become disabled … sort of insane. We endured such torture. Now our main hope is that the international media and the United Nations' investigators come to Tibet and check on the real situation and then report on it after they assess their findings. This is our main hope.

The Chinese are telling us that Tibetans have done illegal things and are arresting and beating us, and even killing many people. Many people have fled to the mountains and dare not return to their homes and families. It will help if the world media see these things and report about them.

The Dalai Lama did not instigate us to do anything. His Holiness did not tell us to fight for independence. His Holiness never said anything of this sort. Many of us support the Dalai Lama's Middle Way approach and the process of solving Tibet's issue through peaceful dialogue. But we are sad about being extremely oppressed today. Today, I, as a witness to truth, am telling through the media, the story of Tibetans killed, undergoing torture in prisons, and about the countless who have been forced to flee to the mountains and are too afraid to return to their homes, so that the media can truthfully report on these situations. This is my hope.

Officers from the security office and secret service as well as work teams have visited my room in the monastery, and are keeping close watch on me. Even now here is one man purposely watching me. I am not allowed to go out, nor am I allowed to make phone calls. I have a thick copy of the Chinese Constitution to study; I am ordered to write a confession. While I am not physically in a prison, I have no freedom whatsoever.

These days there are a series of actions against us, not just in Labrang, not just in Amdo, but in Kham and central Tibet too. Many Tibetans are being killed, many oppressed and arrested. We heard that more than 200 Tibetans were killed and several thousand arrested. Still the beatings and arrests have not stopped. For us, access to news is blocked; we are not allowed to watch news or put up a satellite dish nor are we allowed to listen or watch news from the United States and other foreign countries. We are ordered to watch and listen to domestic broadcasts. We are told not to listen to foreigners nor to talk to them. As such, where is the freedom of expression? Where is the freedom of religion?

Tibetan people are undergoing all kinds of suffering. For me personally, I am a Buddhist monk at Labrang monastery. I was one of those arrested this year. I said this to the face of my captors: if you kill me, then that will be the end of it. But if I am able to go outside and get the opportunity, I will talk about the torture I went through; I will tell the people of the world as a truthful witness, about the sufferings undergone by friends and report these to the media.

Even when I was released, I was told not to tell that I was beaten; I was warned not to contact anyone outside. But I cannot just keep quiet about the tortures I went through, nor the suffering borne by friends. This is also my reason for telling you this today. Still there is a harsh crackdown taking place in Tibetan areas and restrictions on the movement of Tibetans.

These days, the authorities tell us to support the Olympic Games, but Tibetans around here are not even allowed to travel to Lanzhou, let alone go to Beijing to watch and support the games. We are not even allowed to go outside our own areas. Because of the Olympics, even all traditional festivals, celebrations and religious rituals have been banned.

There is a military presence everywhere. In the barn belonging to our monastery, they have made effigies out of straw and dressed them in Tibetan robes. The Chinese soldiers use them for doing bayonet practice. It seems that their enemy are the Tibetan people and the robe-wearing monks. Not all arrested Tibetans were involved in protests. Why are they stabbing their bayonets on the effigy with Tibetan dress as their military exercise? It is not just monks who are suffering as a result of the Chinese viewing Tibetans as their enemy…..even Tibetan staff members, students and the ordinary Tibetans…. all are suffering. This big government, big country, and big nationality is using weapons, tanks and cannons on a small, humble people such as the Tibetans. Thousands of soldiers are surrounding us. ‘Kill the Tibetans who are disobedient’, they order.

In this 21st century, the people of the world are walking on the path to world peace. The peace-loving people and the supporters of truth should expose China for blocking the media and restricting reporters from seeing what is going on inside Tibet. I would like the world’s press, the United Nations and human rights organizations to pay attention and find a solution to the current dire situation for the Tibetan people. You can pressure China to conduct meaningful dialogue with the Dalai Lama's representatives for a mutually beneficial solution to the Tibet-China issue. It is the hope and wish of the Tibetans inside Tibet to invite the Dalai Lama to Tibet. The Chinese Communist Party has stated that stability and unity are important goals for the nation. Now if both the Dalai Lama and the CCP work together to solve the Tibet-China issue through dialogue for the mutual benefit of both the Chinese and Tibetans, there is no reason why genuine and long lasting peace, stability and unity cannot be achieved.

"The Fear in Lhasa, as Felt in Beijing" by Woeser

“But oh that we might be
As splinters of glass
In cupped hands…”
Aung San Suu Kyi


Part I

It was one day in April. When I met DZ, he was standing on the street with the lights just turned on near Saite Shopping centre, dully watching the never-ending flow of cars and people. Earlier, I had heard from JM that there was a Tibetan like this who had come from Lhasa and seldom went out of the house. He also hadn’t gone to parties held by fellow Tibetans. The reason is that his very typical Tibetan looks caught everyone’s attention in present-day Beijing. This is not an exaggeration. Even when Mr. Phuntsok Wangyal, the earliest Tibetan communist in Tibet, went out for a walk, he would be pointed at by a few young Beijing people who would exclaim, “Look at him, if he is not a Tibetan separatist, then he is a Xinjiang separatist!”

I was very surprised to see that DZ was greatly frightened when he heard his name. JM did not expect to run into DZ, then he invited him to join us to go to a café. However, the reason I had gone to meet JM is because I heard that he would go back to Tibet within the next few days. Originally he had been working on temporary jobs in Beijing for a few years, and the reason he was fired was due to his national identity. JM told me that there were altogether eight Tibetans who had been dismissed, but it was not the boss’s fault. This is all because the pressure put on the boss by the local police stations was too great. JM thought it was not a big deal to go back. March twenty years ago was like March twenty years later, there were also many Tibetans who rose in revolt in Lhasa. JM, in his early teens, burned the gate of a shop and, as a result, was imprisoned for four years. It is probably because of such experience that JM could not care less about what happened to him.

It seems that DZ dared not speak Tibetan unscrupulously like JM did, and I could also see he was hesitant about the unexpected invitation, but why didn’t he decline the invitation? I was observing him quietly. It is perhaps because at this moment this Tibetan man, who wears his hair long like herdsman and whose loneliness could not be hidden though dressing in black clothes, needed to get together with a few fellow Tibetans.

There were no other people in the café who could understand Tibetan, but I still dared not hastily ask DZ about what happened in Lhasa. DZ had the disposition of an aristocrat in old days, therefore, I teased him saying, “you look more Tibetan than us. If you wore Tibetan clothes, you would look like a Tibetan in Chi-itsog Nying-pa” (spyi tshog rning pa, old society). But, while laughing, JM said that he himself who was light in colour and thin, definitely could fake his way into the crowd. Thus, DZ suddenly said, “Now I often dream that there are soldiers holding their guns all over Lhasa; while walking on the streets in Beijing, when I see armed police and policemen, I am, for no reason, angry and afraid too". When DZ looked out of the window and said these words in a moderate tone, I knew that he was willing to tell us some things.

“It happened to be March 14 when I fetched the foreign tourists from Dzam to Gyantse. On my way I received a phone call saying that an incident had happened in Lhasa, and Tibetans from Ramoche area had revolted. Originally it was decided that we would not go back to Lhasa, and would temporarily stay in Gyantse, but later I received another phone call urging us to go back. As soon as we arrived in Lhasa, I quickly escorted the foreign guests to their hotel. This was in the afternoon. On the streets near the east there were shops and cars being smashed or burned. I ran to the area near the Post and Telecommunications Building, where there were many people standing on the streetside watching how Tibetans protested. We can say that, for a few hours, Tibet seemed to be independent. Not long after, I saw quite a few armoured cars drive over there, shooting tear-gas with the noise thum-thum-thum. The crowd dispersed right away. Those who had experience were cleaning their eyes with the water in shops. I only felt that my throat hurt greatly, and I could not hold back my tears…”

“Did you see firing at the crowd? ”I asked.

“I didn’t, but my friend saw that a man was killed in the area near Lhasa Middle School, and he was a Tibetan.” DZ gesticulated his forehead, then continued to say,

“I quickly ran back to my place. I was tired and frightened, so I fell asleep as soon as I lied down. But the next day I had to go to take care of those foreign tourists. As soon as I stepped out of my house, I became stunned. In front of me there were soldiers everywhere, some holding sticks and clubs and others holding guns in their hands. I wanted to go back, but the soldiers called out loud to me “Come over!” I had to force myself to go over there. Two soldiers told me to hold up my two hands just like when one surrendered himself, then they searched my body. I was terribly frightened. I had my amulets in the pocket of my jacket,” DZ took out his amulets and showed us very quickly. I noticed that in addition to Sung-dud (srung mdud, a sacred cord) he also had Ten sung (rten srung, amulate). The latter is a sacred object especially blessed by the Dalai Lama and it symbolizes removing ill-fortune and avoiding calamities. It is very precious for Tibetans. “I also had a badge of Kundun (one of the honourific titles for the Dalai Lama). If the badge had been found by the soldiers, then I would definitely have died. I was quietly praying to Kundun. Indeed Kundun was protecting me. Thought that soldier held my pocket between his fingers several times, he did not find it, then he howled at me, “Beat it!” I denoted a sense of gratitude in DZ’s expression of rejoicing at his good fortune. Of course, this was his gratitude toward the Dalai Lama. He prayed, then his prayers were answered.

“I heard that those soldiers also checked Tibetan’s necks, if they found a badge of Kundun hanging on the “Sung dud”, they would pull it off and threw on the ground. Is that so?” I asked.

“Yes, after throwing it on the ground, they also had Tibetans step on it. If anyone refused to trample it, he would be arrested and taken away. Some young people wore rosaries on their wrists, but when they were found by the soldiers, they were also arrested and taken away.” DZ pointed at the rosary on his left wrist.

“Is that the case that only men, men like you would be searched by raising your hands high as if you were surrendering?” I asked.

DZ looked into my eyes, and said slowly, “no, not just men. As long as you are Tibetan, no matter whether you are a man or a woman, old or young, just like me, you would be searched by raising your hands like you were surrendering. Do you know that I had never experienced such an insult before? I saw we Tibetans raising our hands as if we were surrendering and being searched by soldiers with guns in their hands. Even the old people were not spared, neither were girls. I remembered the movies I had watched. Those movies about Japanese ‘devils’ invading China or about the nationalists fighting against the communists were just like what were happening in front of my eyes.” I also looked into DZ’s eyes, and saw that his eyes were full of humiliation.”

I could not help telling him my maternal Uncle’s story. It was nine years ago when Tibetans revolted like today in Lhasa, but later they were suppressed by soldier, led by a steel helmet clad Hu Jintao. In addition, martial law was also imposed in Lhasa. One day, when my Uncle went to work, he forgot to take his pass with him. Consequently, he was searched by the soldiers and he was also ordered to hold his two hands high as if he were surrendering. This greatly irritated my Uncle and later whenever he talked about this experience, he would be so angry as to be choked with sobs. He had followed the Chinese Communist Party as early as since the beginning of 1950s, and he was an old party member and a scholar employed by the government, but since then he understood that as a Tibetan, he would never be trusted.

It was probably because I was a little bit excited, my tone was comparatively high. DZ was a little nervous and looked around. After a little while he continued his account.“The house I rented was also searched. Fortunately, I had already moved to stay with the guests in the hotel. I had a Thangkha in my house which is a portrait of the Dalai Lama but painted like a traditional Thangka. Later my neighbours told me that the house had been searched twice. One time it was searched by armed police, and the other time it was by cadres from the Neighbourhood Committee. Those armed police probably did not recognize that image on the Thangka as the Dalai Lama who is portrayed like Manjushri, so they did not touch it. Cadres from the Neighbourhood Committee were certainly able to tell and I am sure they must have taken pictures and kept a copy for the record. I have a small chest in which I put Tibetan coins I had collected and currencies of various countries given by tourists when I served as their tour guide. This small chest was taken away. I do not know whether it was taken by the armed police or by cadres from the Neighbourhood Committee. They were just like thieves”

“I thought that I could not stay in Lhasa any more and I had to leave, otherwise I would probably be arrested. I heard there were tour guides who had been arrested, at least five of them. I know a few reporters from CCTV in the hotel and they were willing to help me by taking me with them when they left Lhasa. Because of my looks, it would be very difficult for me to pass through many checkpoints guarded by the soldiers, so these reporters told the soldiers that I was a member of the video and photography team. In this way, we went to the railway station together. At the railway station, I saw that a young man with very short hair was arrested and I think he was probably a monk.”

“The train stopped for a little while at Tuotuo River. Outside the window I saw many military trucks and soldiers. The reporters from CCTV probably thought it was fun, so he began to videotape them, as a result, a few solders were very tough, they not only deleted everything in the video camera but also made a record. If a Tibetan had been videotaping, he would definitely have been arrested and taken away. When we arrived in Xining, hotels did not allow Tibetans to stay. Thanks to the reporters from CCTV, at last two molas (old women) and I had a room where we could sleep.

During the first few days in Beijing, when I walked on the street people asked me where I was from, I truthfully told them that I was from Tibet but immediately those people’s expressions became very unsightly. It was as if I were a terrorist. Once I was even interrogated and examined by the armed police. Therefore, if I do not have any errands or business to attend to, then I will not go out, but I feel very bored. Then I watch TV. On TV there were only programmes showing Tibetans beating, smashing, looting or burning but there were never any programmes about how Lhasa and other Tibetan areas are under the control of soldiers. It never mentioned how many Tibetans were killed or arrested. All those officials are lying, claiming that the troops had never fired on people and saying that the troops went on the street to clean the streets. It is right that they came to clean the streets, and what they wiped out were us Tibetans, because we are garbage in their eyes.”

DZ laughed softly. But I perceived the anger and despair in his laughter. For a short while we were all silent. A few westerners passed by outside the window and we saw that a sense of carefree diffuse from their mien and even every pore of theirs. That is a sense of light heartedness without any fear, and that is a kind of a lighthearted attitude of people who do not have to be afraid any more. It was for this freedom that DZ fled to Beijing and was enduring every fearful day in Beijing, patiently waiting for the permit of a certain embassy.

I remembered it was late at night when we left the café. The lights were brighter and the Chinese were still rushing about like tidal water. Suddenly DZ, who looks more Tibetan than any of us, opened up his fist and said in a very low voice, “I worry that they would recognize me as a Tibetan, so I dare not wear it any more.” And in the palm of his hand was a small turquoise earring.


Part II

One day in April I used the payphone at a Newsstand to call and say hello to my two friends in Amdo and Kham, and it is fortunate that they are both safe. What made me want to laugh and make me feel sad is that though they live in different Tibetan areas, both of them repeatedly urged me to zab zab je (zab zab gsogs byas) (meaning be careful and cautious). It reminded me that when I was in Lhasa during Losar (Tibetan New Year) last year, my friend who only tells me his true feelings said that now we should not use “Tashi Delek” (bkra shis bde legs, auspicious and good fortune) to greet each other because we are neither “tashi” (auspicious) nor delek (fortunate), so what we should use to admonish others is “zab zab je”.

So does WD. When he said goodbye to me, he just said “zab zab je”, then he disappeared into the crowd of people. He is a Tibetan man who would be recognized as Tibetan even if he did not wear Tibetan clothes. I only recently got to know him, and I have met him three times. But I can not describe it in too much detail, as he repeatedly told me, “Do not write who I am. I still want to go back to Lhasa. My I.D. card was recorded by them and they also took my picture. Do not write who I am, otherwise they will find me.” He is a young and handsome Amdo Tibetan, but his two eyebrows were knotted showing that many worries were weighing on his mind, and frequently he would suddenly look around as if he were frightened. In spite of the situation, he readily agreed to my request to interview him. At that time we accidentally met each other, and it was so accidental that it appears to have been destined. Meeting each other at that place and at that moment unexpectedly seems as if he just wanted to tell me about his experience. However, it did not go smoothly when we tried to meet again. Soon we parted with each other and each went our own way because there were people following us. Only when we met the third time very cautiously, perhaps because no one paid any attention to us, I was able to have a complete record.

On one afternoon we chose to sit at a table in a corner facing far away from the windows and the door so that we could see whether there were any unusual things going on. The backs of our seats were comparatively high, so it was not easy for people to notice us. Also there were not many people around us. They were either playing cards or chatting, and they hardly interfered with each other’s business. When WD saw me getting ready to record, then he said:

“I need to start with March 10. About 5:00pm that afternoon, when I just arrived at “Makye Ame” (the Tibetan restaurant located at the intersection of the South Street and East Street in Barkhor), I ran into a friend who told me that an incident happened at Tsulhakhang (Jokhang Temple) square. We ran to see what happened and we saw eight people were arrested and thrown into the police car. Four of them were Ku zhab (sku zhabs, monks), and some said that the other four were Khampas but others said that they were from Amdo. Anyway, they were very young. Still others said that before this some monks were already arrested. It seems that the policemen were from Barkhor Police Station and they beat people viciously. There were many onlookers. Some Tibetans said quietly “nying je, nying je” (rnying rje, pity, pity) a few mola (old women) were crying, covering their mouths. My friend used his cell phone to take pictures, then a policeman in plain clothes came over and snatched the camera away, and confiscated it. We were very frightened.

“On the second day, the policemen in plain clothes increased greatly right away in the Barkhor Street. There were also thirty or forty women with very short hair, and all of them were Han Chinese. When they saw there were people chatting with each other, they would walk over to listen to the conversations. I do not know whether they could understand but they scared people. They had their lunch and dinner on the square, they ate food in boxes delivered to them. There were cars that sent boxed lunches and dinners. The crowd did not disperse until it was about to be dusk. All Tibetans knew that they were policemen in plain clothes, and we were reminding each other quietly. There were also more policemen, who looked very serious, and were walking back and forth in the square. Oh, that’s right, I heard that monks from Drepung and Sera Monasteries had staged a demonstration but they were beaten back by many armed police. The Jokhang and Ramoche Temples were also closed [to the public].

“On the day of 14th I remember very clearly that I left at 11:20am… (I omitted this part). Before that time, I had already heard shouting…”

I interrupted him and said, “ I heard about this on TV. Only Tibetans, and only Tibetans from the countryside and grassland could make that kind of sound. Tibetans in the cities could not make any such sound as their throats have already degenerated.” Furthermore, I also wanted to say it is a pure Tibetan–style whistle, but it was portrayed as “howling of wolves.”

WD nodded his head, and said: “Yes, it is exactly that kind of sound. After 11:20 am, like any other day, when I, together with a few of my friends, passed by Ramoche Temple, an incident had already happened there. Many Tibetans were shouting, and were throwing stones at the soldiers. We were all stupefied. We heard somebody near us saying that for these last few days there had been police cars at the gate of Ramoche Temple, and just now some monks rushed out to overturn the cars as they claimed that the cars were blocking the road to the monastery. Immediately, the policemen called the armed police to come to assist them, then those armed police who had shields and sticks in their hands began to beat the monks. Tibetans on the streets could not bear to continue to watch the zhim jang (zhim chang) thus the people began to demonstrate … I saw many Tibetans were very young, and not well dressed. While throwing stones, they were shouting “come out, tsampa eaters”. A Tibetan peddler wanted to join the others, but his wife exerted all her strength to drag his arms while crying, and pleaded him not to go. There were also many girls, who said to us “young man, are you still a Tibetan? If you are, then come over to join us”, and when they saw we did not join them, they spat on the ground, and said scornfully, “ngo tsa, ngo tsa (ngo tsha, shame on you)”. To tell you the truth, I was very sad, but I dared not to participate, and only stood aside to watch. Among my friends, some of them ran over there and threw a stone, but immediately they came back again.”

“Wait,” I again interrupted him, “do you think this is an organized and pre-meditated event?”

“Kun chok sum (sku mchog gsum, Vow to the Three Jewels of Buddha, Dharma and Sangha), it is not so.” WD sadly waved his head. He continued to say:

“The stones they threw were those used by people in the neighborhood to build their houses. Some of them were holding knives, but they were not Tibetan knives, instead, they were long knives. I do not know where they got them either. Many people were waving khatas, and it is possible they seized them from the nearby shops, anyway, there were many khatas in those shops. Then they poured into Tromsikhang (the market at the corner of Barkhor Street) from Ramoche Temple. On the way, many shops owned by Chinese and Chinese Muslims (Hui) were destroyed. Part of the Tromsikhang market was also burned down. The Chinese all ran away, and the Chinese Muslims took off their white caps and ran away, too. It is strange that no policemen were there, and all of them also ran away.”

I asked, “don’t they know there are video cameras all over the Barkhor area?”

“They know. Many people know that there are video cameras, but they weren’t afraid,” WD paused for a little while and he appeared to be hesitant, finally he said,
“They did it for the sake of our nationality. They are really tough.” This is what WD said, and I had a rather deep impression of his words.

“I had been following the people all the time. There were more and more people pouring from Tromsikhang into the Barkhor area. There were about 100 people. There were people from Amdo, Kham and Lhasa. There were also a few monks. People walked around the Barkhor twice. While walking, they were shouting “Gyawa Rinpoche kutse trilo tenpa sho (Long live the Dalai Lama), “Bo Rangzen” (Tibetan Independence). While they were walking around, they destroyed the shops owed by the Chinese and Chinese Muslims. Silk and satin in one shop were thrown out, which was colourful and they were scattered all over the ground. Some people also set fire to Barkhor police station diagonally across from Jokhang Temple but it did not burn fiercely. I called JM in Beijing and he was very excited when he heard the news. It was because in March 1988, similar things happened. At that time JM was a teenager, he burned the gate of a shop and he was imprisoned for four years. Probably when it was nearly 3:00pm or it just after 3:00pm, people in black clothes came, their faces covered and only showing two eyes. They were holding guns and they fired at people.

“Who are these people?” I asked surprised.

“Special police! Like the “Flying Tigers”
Flying tigers? I did not know who they were, they probably have something to do with some films or TV programmes but I know who the special police are, thus, I did not interrupt him again.

“There were about thirty or forty people who were all dressed in black with their faces covered. They only showed their eyes and were holding their guns high. At that time, I was at the entrance of North Barkhor street, I saw them rushing to Tsulhakhang Square, and they threw teargas bombs into the crowd. People in the front were stopped and arrested. Then they fired and killed people in the back. I, together with many people, was frightened and we retreated back into Barkhor Street. But not very far from the entrance of North Barkor Street, it was right there when a teenaged girl picked up a stone and was about to throw it, the special police fired at her, and the bullet pierced through her throat. She fell on the ground right away. At that time I was over ten or twenty meters away from her and I saw it very clearly. Many people saw that. It was really horrible… I think she was only seventeen or eighteen years old.”

I realized that WD was shivering, and it seems that he still had lingering fear. This made me feel anxious, and the pain I was feeling was just like I was on that scene.

After quite a while WD began to recall again, “That girl fell on the ground, twitching and bleeding. Very soon the car of the special police drove over, their car looked like a Toyota 4500 in a dark color. The car stopped right in front of the girl, then two special policemen jumped off the car, and threw the girl’s corpse into the car. The car again continued to drive forward a little, then turned back. It is very strange that after the car drove back and forth, there was no blood on the ground. There was not even a blood stain on the ground.

I had never heard this before. This was apparently a police car, not a street cleaning car! But WD insisted on this and said, “Yes. It is not a street cleaning car but it is just like a street cleaning car which completely cleans the blood on the ground.” Can that be a new-style police car? Does that even have the function to clean the slaughter scene? Later I searched for the police car for special police on the internet, and I found a police car which can spray water. Except special police cars which can spray water up and down as well as left and right, there are also those equipped with supervision video cameras which can revolve 360 degrees. There were also those equipped with revolving platforms from which to shoot tear-gas canons. But I still do not know whether there are any police cars equipped with cleaning functions to clean blood stains and others. Are they any such kinds of police cars?

WD said, “Except this girl, I did not see any dead people. But a friend who owns a restaurant in Barkhor saw from the roof that the special police fired and killed many people in Barkhor. It is strange that these special policemen seemed to be in charge of Barkhor only, not other areas. At that time, we saw that the corpse of the girl was being taken away by the police car, I, together with other people, started to flee. I ran all the way to Makye Ame restaurant, then turned a corner, and ran across the small alley. Most of the shops on both sides were destroyed, and many messy things were scattered all over on the way. As you know, this area is mostly Chinese Muslim and the mosque is just ahead. I saw some Tibetans burning cars. Three cars and one motorcycle were set on fire in front of the mosque. I dared not stay, so I walked through the crowd and walked through that especially high gate. TAR Public Security Bureau is located just across the street. What is more strange is that there were over ten policemen in front of the gate of the TAR Public Security Bureau, but they only stood there looking on. But only one street away, there were actually Tibetans smashing and burning things. I remember two butcher shops owned by Chinese Muslims and seven cars were destroyed, but the policemen did not do anything. They acted as if this had nothing to do with them. There were also many onlookers, who were standing on the edge of the streets. They were watching and discussing things amongst themselves.”

“They did not do anything? Why?” I asked.

“Who knows? Right, I saw a few policemen taking pictures. Ah, there were also policemen videotaping.” WD was recalling. “Now I remember that it is indeed very strange. There was only one street between these two sides, but they were like two worlds.

Even now I still do not understand why the special policemen in Barkhor fired and killed people, but the policemen outside of Barkhor did not go to stop [the people] at all? It seems that not long after there were three tanks that drove over from Jiangsu Road, and arrived at Lingkhor East Road. All the soldiers in the tanks were holding guns.

“Tanks?” I asked in disbelief, “were they tanks or armoured cars? Those government officials said that no tanks entered Lhasa.”

“Of course, they were tanks, only later were there armoured cars.” WD said absolutely, “Do you mean to say that I can not even tell apart tanks from armored cars? They are tanks with tracks. When the tanks drove over, the ground was vibrating. As soon as people saw tanks coming, all the onlookers dispersed. I ran away too, but I dared not to go back to the nearby house I rented, so I had to go straight to the left side. I have a friend living there.”

“What were the tanks doing?” I again interrupted his recalling. What appeared in my mind were the scenes of the PLA tanks rolling over the civilians and students on Beijing streets on June 4th, 1989.

“I don’t know what the tanks were doing because I simply fled,” WD said. “ I ran away to my friend’s house. He had also just came back home from somewhere. Both of us were still badly startled, so we drank some alcohol to help us to get over the shock. I never drink any white liquor, and if I want to drink, I only drink beer, but my friend only had barley beer from Huzhu (Gonlung) County in Qinghai, a few bottles. Later two more friends came to my friend’s house, thus, we started to drink one bottle after another. We drank beer until past 11:00 at night,and we were all drunk. We were not very drunk, but it seems that we all had courage now and no matter what, we wanted to go back to our own places. When we three arrived at the crossroads of Jiangsu East Road, we were stunned, and almost sobered up. Because forty or fifty soldiers were standing there, with their guns in their hands, and they were also holding rubber clubs, batons or something like them. We were ordered to stop and hand in our papers. Luckily we had our I.D cards in our wallets, then the soldiers said “beat it.” One of my friends shot off his mouth, “We have our papers, on what grounds do you scold us?” Immediately we were done for. The soldiers pounced on us and started to beat us. Two of them held our arms and two others started to randomly beat us right in the face. My eyes were beaten severely and began to swell and at that time I thought I would be beaten so severely that I would become blind. These soldiers kicked us and scolded us, until we fell down… (this part was omitted)… We were taken to the police station. There two policemen came who took our pictures and recorded our I.D. numbers. When we were interrogated, one Tibetan police said in Tibetan “Don’t say too much.” He sounded very vicious, so the Chinese policeman must have thought that he was scolding us. I did not expect at this time there would be a policeman who would help Tibetans. Perhaps because they could not get anything out of three drunkards, eventually they released us. Luckily the house I rented is not very far from the police station. Because I heard gun shots all the way home, so I do not know, I really do not know how many people like that girl were killed.”

“My two friends live in the area over the Tibet Academy of Social Sciences, but they dared not go further so they stayed at my house. But we did not expect that they had to stay there for four days. On the morning of 15th, I wanted to buy some food, drinks and cigarettes, but I began to regret it as soon as I went out of my house. Soldiers were everywhere on the streets. Some were holding guns and pickaxes without the tips. I was about to turn back, but a little boy ten metres away, who was only seven or eight years old, actually threw a stone at the soldiers, immediately, the soldiers started to shoot tear-gas. Suddenly, people were running everywhere. I dared not to go out any more. Luckily the house I rented was used by a work unit to store odds and ends, thus, no soldiers broke into to check the house. But there were soldiers on the roof of the building, and there were also soldiers in the courtyard. In addition, there were many military trucks and cars. For the entire four days, we closed the curtains, sat in the room to watch TV, or to sleep. At the beginning we still chatted with each other, but later we seldom talked any more, and each was thinking about the weight on his mind. During the daytime, sometimes we couldn’t help but open the curtain a little to look out, but no matter when we looked out, all we saw were soldiers. When it was dark, we dared not turn on the lights, nor did we dare to watch TV. While sitting in the dark, we dared not make any noise, and we were very hungry…”

“Then what did you eat?” I can not help asking him.

“Ah, ah, we were lucky that I had bought a box of milk earlier, and I also had bread I had brought back from home when I went back to celebrate New Year. At the time, I did not want to eat these, because there were so many restaurants in Lhasa, so who wanted to eat bread at home? As a result, there was green mildew on the bread. But at that time we had to eat the bread with the milk. After we got rid of the green mildew on the bread, we would swallow it together with the milk. There was a disgusting taste, but we could not afford to care about that. As I said before, fortunately the house I rented belongs to a work unit, later I heard that all three of my friends who rented rooms at the big compounds inhabited by many families were all arrested. Though they never shouted a slogan, did not throw a stone, nor were they even among the onlookers, they were actually arrested and taken away. What made it very funny is the reason for their arrest is that one of them has very long hair and looks like an impressive Khampa, the other has very short hair and looks very much like a monk. As for the reason for the third one, ah, ah, he has a gold tooth inlaid in his mouth.”

“Gold tooth?” I was so astonished that I promptly asked him why.

“Oh, As you know, many Khampas and Amdo people love to inlay gold in their teeth, and there were many Khampas and Amdo people who participated in this uprising. The reason he was arrested because of his golden tooth is probably because he was suspected to be a Khampa or an Amdo person. I heard he was arrested because of this reason. But I do not know what happened to them now. The person who is in charge of houses in the work unit from which I rented my house was very nervous. He is from Lhasa, and he is very timid. Every night he would come to my house quietly to remind me not to turn on any lights, but later he simply drove me out. I told him that I rented the house for three months, and it was not three months yet, then he gave back part of the rent to me, and wrote a testimonial for me. He insisted that no matter what I should move out. On the 19th, I was forced out of the house. Since then I bid goodbye to my two friends, and went out on our own separate ways.

“I stayed at a friend’s house for three days, then I heard that they had begun to sell train tickets, then I directly went to the train station. On my way to the train station, only two kilometers from my friend’s house to the railway station, I was checked by soldiers with guns and clubs seven times. They all spoke Sichuan dialect. They were thin and small, and looked like mice, but they were more frightened than tigers.

They repeatedly checked my I.D card and my certificate of temporary residence. If the person does not look like the photo in the papers, he would be arrested and taken away right on the spot. They also checked very carefully the text messages and pictures in people’s cell phones. Fortunately, I can not take pictures with my cell phone. My luggage was also leafed through and checked. I had one small album in it, and they opened the album and looked at the pictures one by one. The strangest thing is that they actually told me to roll back my sleeves, and stroked my two arms back and forth several times. Why? Were they looking for rosaries? If a person was wearing rosaries on one’s wrist, if one is not a monk, then one is somebody who believes in Buddhism. Later I heard there were people who were arrested because of rosaries. Eventually, I was able to buy a standing room ticket. After I entered the train, before I had time to feel that I was lucky, over a dozen policemen came. So many people came over and surrounded me, they actually only checked me. When I saw they only checked me, not the Chinese who filled the railway carriage, and also witnessed that they leafed thought my bag and messed it up, I was so angry that I began to quiver, and I almost burst out.”

“It is fortunate that you did not burst out.” I gazed at the young Amdo man with bushy eyebrows and big eyes, thinking to myself that after all he endured and survived all this.

“I understand what you mean,” he said, “you feel that I am like a refugee, and there is only the last moment. I should absolutely not resist, is that so?”
“Certainly.” I said.

WD lowered his head, then raised his head and looked around, then he bowed down his head again. After a while, he said in feeble voice, “In fact I regret very much and have been regretting all the time. After I saw with my own eyes that the girl was killed, I began to regret. But no matter how regretful I feel, I will not do anything. Because in my ears, I always hear a voice saying “zab zab je”.

By then I knew WD’s recalling had ended at last. When he rose and left before me, and repeatedly told me to “zab zab je”, I sighed with unspeakable emotions. Apparently he is still afraid, but he did not keep silent because of fear, on the contrary, he was willing to allow me to record and make public his experience full of fear. Why? Once I read an article by Aung San Suu Kyi about fear and freedom, and she used verses to describe people who show courage when they were attempting to free themselves of suppression. When I read it again at this moment, I found that it to also be true for Tibetans:

“Emerald cool we may be
As water in cupped hands
But oh that we might be
As splinters of glass
In cupped hands…”

Translated from Chinese
June 1, 2008, Beijing
View the original here